Thursday, January 8, 2009

A Very Merry Christmahanakwanza To All!

Yes, I know it's January...err...something. I realize that all the holidays are long over and that Easter candy is already making its way into the grocery stores (I know this because I've already eaten a fistful of Cadbury eggs.)

Seriously, is it just me or do these candies give you the feeling that the Easter bunny is having unprotected sex with a chicken?

Either way, those bastard love child eggs are delicious!

Right, back to the holidays. After listening to way too many people bemoan the ritual of buying gifts, putting up trees, and anything having to do with the holidays, I realized that I'm one of the lone lovers of Christmas. I mean, it's not like I go around dressed like an elf singing "Here comes Santa Claus" (or, at least, not on the weekdays), but I am in love with Christmas - mostly because it's the only holiday that truly celebrates gaudiness and everything shiny. And with that in mind, the tree went up and tinsel was strewn everywhere. Even the cat's turds became remarkably more sparkly.

As I was looking for gifts, I found myself wandering over to the children's section of the bookstore where two books immediately caught my attention:

Inside the Titanic: A Children's Cutaway Book

And Gizmo and the Gremlins.

Awesome. Now I have books that will teach my kid valuable lessons - stuff they can really use, not like that "treat people the way you want to be treated" crap. Ahh, yes. I can already envision us lying together and reading stories that will teach Slaggy that boats don't always float and that if your cute little fuzzy pet gets wet, it will become evil and try to eat your face.

Good times, good times.

And now, in lieu of a resolution, I offer you a New Year's observation. This being the first New Years I haven't woken up in a world of eye pain and/or slumped over a toilet, I noticed something that had never occurred to me before. People, everywhere, were constantly bidding other people a "Happy New Years!" I heard this more than any other holiday greeting I've ever heard before, which I found odd, given that I'd only ever associated New Years as a fake holiday that serves only to celebrate mass drunkeness.

And yet, here I was, being bid a "Happy News Years" every few minutes. I guess, between the people who love holidays and the people who hate them, we all love to celebrate the equivalent of the odometer hitting all zeros. So, I hope you and yours are having a happy new year, even if it is a bit late.

1 comment:

L. Advie said...

Happy New Year
Thanks for sharing